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Wednesday, November 05, 2008

Of manners...

While I was at college, and especially at university, manners were something everybody looked down upon. When a friend did you a really huge favor, thanking him only meant you’re not his friend yet. When in college, it is a friend’s bounden duty to do whatever you want him/her to do. (Of course, it works both ways, you also will have to go out of your way to help them) Thanking a friend, or making sure you split the bill when you have tea is an insult to friendship. And that’s only when we’re students.
But when you start working, you have to pay special attention to what you take and give. “It’s only natural” to make sure you pay-back in some way or the other the treat that particular friend took you out on. I hardly ever used to do that in university and now I begin to wonder how many people I have offended that way. I guess this ‘mannerlessness’ among friends is one of the things I like about the North Indians, who take favors done by friends for granted.

I find it distracting, but everybody else does it! Talk about a cultural shift! Well, this is what moving on means… You do not complain about how shallow friendships have become, but learn to accept the fact that no one trusts nobody else in this big bad world, and every small thing that involves money should be treated as business, no matter how they act about it.

This post, I feel is one of the most haphazard ones I have ever written, but this is just what my mind feels like at this moment of confusion.

3 comments:

PPP said...

have you read marcel mauss? there is no such thing as a free gift!

PPP said...

and you know I always thought it was the other way around? When you work, you're supposed to act like you can foot all the bills that ever come your way.
When you're a student, dutch is the way to go. And it's never indecent to ask your friends to pay you back, even if it's 5 bucks. That's what college was to me..
I think I'm in wrong company.

sam said...

Well, after Kim's magnanimity, I think we can forget about all code of conduct when it comes to bill paying. Kim can take care of it!